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6.23.2011

Top Ten Reasons Why Baseball is Better than Men

I'm going through an awesome break-up right now. Literally, the only thing keeping me in a decent enough mood not to trash all of his shit and burn the house down is my undying love for baseball. And my girlfriends.

I could sit all day and think up reasons why baseball is better than my ex-boyfriend, and for all you men out there, why it's a million times more enjoyable than your stupid ex-girlfriend. Lizzy did one of these lists back in 2007, and of course, it still applies. So here we go.

10. Baseball's only excuse for being late is the rain.

9. Baseball will never cheat on you with a chick who isn't even hot.

8. Baseball will always be there for you. Unless there's another strike.

7. Joe Mauer.

6. With baseball, you never have to worry about being slobbered all over when you slide into second base, or hear "Oops that never happens to me" after a home run.

5. Baseball is full of surprises and will never ever get boring or monotonous.

4. Baseball can't get you pregnant.

3. Your baseball team has 40 men for you to choose from, 25 of them readily available.

2. When you introduce baseball to your parents, they won't be disappointed.

1. Your team winning the World Series is better than any sex you have ever or will ever have. Ever.

Please feel free to add your own reasons why baseball is better than your ex in the comments section.

23 comments:

Megs said...

No man is worth going to prison for arson Sooze. :)