Batting PracticeIt can be fun when you get in a groove. It can be awesome when you get a ball in the parking lot that can clear everything. It can also start fights if you see so many Happy Youngsters going after what's rightfully yours.
But only one night a year, Batting Practice takes it to the next level. ESPN takes control, and the mellifluous tones of Chris Berman and the general savvy of Joe Morgan take us to another place. State Farm gives us the Home Run Derby, and it allowed my giant Irish head to look as smart as it's been in a while!
For you see, I called it. Before the names were announced. Yeah, me. Give me a second.
Hear that sound? That's me patting myself on the back.
But for a full FIFTEEN MINUTES! I watched baseballs fly out of the park. And my guy! My guy! He had tied the game! I was excited!
But my heart...it just could not take the excitement. I had to change the channel to something less pulse pounding. And I missed the derby winner. Aren't I awesome?
So, yeah. The winner of the Babes Love Baseball contest won while watching exactly 15 minutes of it. Glorified practices announced by people who make my ears bleed and my head hurt are not high priority in the ol' parental basement.
I watched Pro Wrestling. Apparently Chris Jericho looks like the Hells Kitchen Guy now. And I won your baseball contest. What?
I am better than you. I am better than all of you. Especially Reggie. He stole my real pick. And that's why I won.
I'm going to take a victory lap!
Send me my hat and water bottle please.