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5.02.2007

Under The Bleachers

Photo of John Kruk's out-of-control hair courtesy of The Sports Hernia
We caught up with John Kruk's hair this afternoon to find out what the hell happened to it.

Lizzy: Hi.... hair.

John Kruk's Hair: Helloooooo ladies.

Sooze: Would you please enlighten us as to why you've grown so unmanageable?

Eric Byrnes' hair has a reputation for being out of controlJohn Kruk's Hair: It all started when Orel Hershiser's hair and I were hanging out on the set. We were reminiscing about Eric Byrnes' hairstyle he was sporting during his appearance on Baseball Tonight during last season's playoffs.

Lizzy: Of course.

John Kruk's Hair: We were talking about how fun it would be to grow long and luxurious before going completely bald.

Sooze: You do realize how ridiculous you look, right? I mean, it's rather distracting. Viewers have a hard enough time taking whatever comes out of John Kruk's mouth seriously without -

John Kruk reportedly loves hoagiesJohn Kruk's Hair: Oh, his mouth is a different story. I have no control over that bastard. When the mouth and brain get together, it's totally out of control. Especially around lunch time. And dinner. And breakfast and...

Lizzy: We get the idea.

Sooze: So, the whole gelled-mullet thing is in nowadays? Cause I wasn't aware.

John Kruk's Hair: No, but Orel's 'do and I feel it's making a comeback!

Lizzy: Highly unlikely, but we'll make a note of it.

Sooze: That's all the time we have left for today. Thanks for your time, Mr. Hair. You're truly bold and unpredictable.

John Kruk's Hair: I do my best to offend.

[Photo of Kruk's hair courtesy of ] | [Photo of Byrnes' hair courtesy of Can't Stop The Bleeding]

5 Comments:

kerrie said...

I'm glad so many bloggers are exploiting John Kruk's hair style. It really is awful and distracting.